I think throughout Westernisation we have forgotten that one of the most healing tools we have in regards to our emotions and overall well-being is, sex.
Sex with mutual interest and pure intention.
When we are experiencing deep, continuous feelings of sadness or any other ‘lower vibrational’ emotion, we are telling our bodies it’s not safe to fully expand and feel. But what is living if we don’t have feeling? The heaviness can cause us to become numb, not only emotionally, but our physical touch can become impaired too. Our immune system weakens along with our auric field, and we are more susceptible to spiritual attacks.
Have you ever been on a night out (alcohol weakens your aura) everything is bless one minute, then within a couple of seconds you tune in and can feel it about to kick off before it actually does? Everyone’s fuckeries are all mingling together, riling each other up. For women especially, we sense that shit. It’s unsafe. Our instincts kick in and tell us to seek safety, or if you’re a wild one, it’s a fight ting.
Fight or flight, baby. Our internal safety system, I know it’s saved me more times than I can count... got me clarted one time too.
If you aren’t aware, our emotions are energy. E-motion = energy in motion. The more blissful the emotion, the higher the energetic vibration. Emotions such as: anger, shame, guilt, sadness and so on, are examples of lower vibrational emotions. I have attached a diagram to give you a visual representation - pree that
Managing our emotions can be a challenge, especially when we have to deal with unexpected, large life changes. I am a huge advocate for meditation because it allows us to focus our energy inward when our external world is forcing our energy into areas we cannot control. Focus is power. During meditation, we are aiming to raise our current vibration. We do so by training ourselves to invoke these higher vibrational emotions on demand via visualisations of memories, desires for the future, and whatever tools work for the individual. As a result, we train our mind and body like a muscle and can create these higher states of being whenever we desire, not to say it's not a challenge some days - we are human after all. Advancing through the different brain waves helps you reach 'ultimate consciousness' which can also be referred to as: God, The Divine, The Universe, energy, whatever you believe in; it's all the same shizz.
There are 5 different types of brain waves: Beta Waves are split into low, mid and high range categories. Low range reflects a relaxed state with no perceived external threats, but fully conscious. You are in this state when you are reading or attentively listening/having a friendly conversation. Mid range reflects a more heightened state of being, its anytime you need to be a tad more vigilant, like having to remember what was said in a meeting; its good stress. High range reflects being cracked out on stress hormones, these are the brain waves you create when experiencing 'survival' emotions such as anger, grief, agitation, frustration and so on.
Alpha Waves come into play during specific periods of the day; although majority of the day you are in beta mode. Alpha is a reflection of being in a creative, day dreaming, trance state. You're no longer thinking and analysing - you're in flow with more focus on your inner world.
Theta Waves are emitted during the transitional period of being awake and falling to sleep, this is similar to being in a deep meditative state. When you are awake you are conscious, when you are asleep, your subconscious is running the game so this state is the in-between. When we work on re-wiring our beliefs and habits, this is the state we want to be in as it allows our conscious to speak to our subconscious.
Delta Waves are created when we are in a deep, restorative sleep, but can also be achieved during meditation. Being able to enter this state during meditation takes practice and control, this being will be able to cultivate peace effortlessly and has a focus of being of service to the collective.
Gamma Waves are not easily achievable but top tier monks have been known to be able to reach this superconsciousness. In my opinion, you are God and you are talking to yourself as this point.
So what does this all have to do with sexual healing, Shannon?
If we look at the diagram, we can see emotions such as: love, joy, bliss and enlightenment are of the higher vibrations. I don’t know about you, but if I’m not experiencing any of these emotions during a good dicking down then… why are my legs open?
When we are operating from higher vibrations, we are experiencing a more fulfilled way of living and loving. Manifestations come to fruition a lot faster, day to day desires seem to effortlessly unfold; life becomes utterly sweet and aligned.
When we are feeling like shit, many of us resort to sex. We’ve exhausted other external coping mechanisms to feel half decent, but we know a good sweaty session will hit the cold, dark spot we need it to. Scientifically, sex has a phenomenal impact on our physical, mental and emotional body - it helps the spiritual body too. Endorphins and oxytocin are released during sex - these juicy feel good hormones activate pleasure centres in the brain. Leading to feelings of intimacy and relaxation; helping to swerve unpleasant feelings like anxiety and depression.
The connection (if all is going swiftly) during the union invokes higher vibrational emotions which will help rise the auric field and move any stagnant energy that may be stuck in the vessel. And this is just sex. An orgasm is a whole other bludclart level. I have mentioned to you before about the people who cry during the deed, or who show real intense emotion after an orgasm. It's because that energetic build up and release has shifted the stagnant emotions that have been trapped by avoidance, escapism and so on.
Did you know we emit the strongest energy when we orgasm? The duality of surrendering and receiving simultaneously, creates euphoria - this short lived paradise is what our ancestors believed to be our ‘natural state of being’. Sexual energy is LIFE energy, the energy used to create both art and life.
It's so much more than just flesh rubbing together, excreting and sharing juices...
Western paradigms on sex and relationships has never tickled my fancy. So rigid, so judgmental, hypocritical even. You know how many marriages wouldn’t have ended (and started) if people were just honest about their sexual desires and needs? Monogamy is not for everyone. People are just afraid of owning their truth because it's not something they've been shown to do - its the fear of judgement and the unknown.
From a Western view, cultures with multiple wives is ‘shocking’, but is it really? I find it cool as fuck. Multiple women/men coming together to raise the next generation, sharing wisdom and insight. That shit is fucking dope. No doubt it comes with its challenges but I know a lot of parents in the UK would cluck at the idea of having a support system like that.
I know people in the UK who find the idea disgusting and judge those wives - the ones who share one husband. They try and shame them and their families, but when we look at the dynamics of those who judge and those who share; the shared husband is one who is bound by duty and fully provides for his spouse and children - multiple of them. The ones who judge show less than desirable life skills for one child...
We should never judge what we don’t understand - especially if we have never put any real effort in to understand it.
There are tribes and communities all over the globe, ranging from Africa to South America, from Greece to India, who use sex in ritual as a right of passage or means to heal. In the Sambian tribe between the ages of 5-10, boys have to ingest semen from the mightiest warriors of the community - it is believed that the semen contains “jurungdu” a substance that will make them strong. In Mangaia, young men are supposed to sleep with older women so they are taught how to please their future partners. The Kreung Tribe in Cambodia builds love huts for their teenage girls to 'test'' the boys in the community before declaring who they love and wish to betroth. In Niger, the Wodaabe tribe hold a wife-stealing festival every year…
From our Western perspective these traditions may seem horrific and cult-like, but we have not grown with the traditions or lived the lives to be able to understand the anatomy of what they’re doing and why they're doing it. Anyone outside of the Western culture may view our traditions as bizarre too; we don't know what we don't know. In some cases, the whole community is involved, if you and your partner are having issues, you sit down as a community to resolve them. There are blessings, there are offerings and advice is sought from the Gods.
I feel we inflict a lot of pain on ourselves in the West. We overcomplicate things and our priorities are mixed up with greed and materialistic desires. Nothing ever satiates our hunger here. Simplicity is underrated massively.
I could talk about this subject for a while, if you couldn't tell?
Sex workers are not just selling sex. They are selling connection. They are providing a safe space for men to be open and vulnerable. I really do not understand why they get a bad name. It may not be your cup of tea, but this is one of the oldest professions known to man.
It’s hard for ‘good' men to get an opportunity to feel appreciated and connected in this day and age, so imagine what it’s like for a man who is deemed as undesirable by society? Does that mean that he doesn’t deserve pleasure? That he doesn’t deserve to feel seen? Whether they are buying the experience or not, we all deserve human connection and we all need it to live happy, stable lives. The same goes for women but as we know, this occurs a lot less frequently for them.
Them shooters up in the States? More time its men who are deemed as undesirable by society and have no healthy feminine connection in their lives...
Does everything I’m saying depend on context? Yes of course it does. Theres men addicted to sex workers because of whatever internal issues they’re choosing to bury with their encounters. There are spiritual doctors who use their influence and power to manipulate innocent people to indulge in their lustful fantasies. The point I’m trying to make is that sex is fucking healing - when not abused.
When I tell you guys it's all interconnected.. IT'S ALL INTERCONNECTED - mind, body & spirit.
I mentioned earlier how when we are experiencing a lot of emotional pain, our sensory receptors can become a lot less sensitive. When I was still unhealed, gentle sensual sex, did not do it for me. I couldn’t feel it enough. I had to be aggressively fucked for me to receive pleasure. I had to inflict pain on my guy to make him angry with me so he would fuck me harder, just so I could feel something. I don't have that kind of sex now - it hurts. I’m down for some aggression, some kink, but it needs to be because that’s what I WANT at that time.
Not because that’s the only way for me to feel.
I must remind you, whenever I've referred to embracing our highest selves, it doesn’t mean we don’t feel lower vibrational emotions anymore. ALL emotions are valid and serve their perfect purpose in each of our journeys. Embracing our highest selves means not letting these emotions consume us when they make their appearance. Emotions are here to serve as information. They help us make our next move, they must be acknowledged, respected and processed appropriately. Dismissing or suppressing them only leads to further chaos, this can show up as mental and physical illness further down the line.
Sex, like anything, can be good and bad for us.
The reason I talk about sex and intention so much is because without clear intention, sex can cause chaos. The union of energies can deplete your health just as easily as it can make you feel better - this is something we are seeing more and more in this day and age.
When I wasn’t being honest about my true reasons for wanting sex, the sex caused me problems. Not just with other people, but internally too. I needed to be caressed with care and compassion in order to shake up my stagnant energy; the sexual aggression was just adding to the tensions that were causing me pain. Now I am aware of my truest desires around intimacy, my sex has been profoundly more fulfilling. This is also due to me being more patient when selecting partners. I found in the past there were times where I was being honest with myself and partner, but their lack of authenticity and integrity being pumped into my vagina caused me to have less than desirable after effects. That semen can be a demon, hun.
If you believe sexual partners don't leave an imprint on you, I'm not sure why you made it this far.
I’m not saying your intention has to be hugely significant. You don’t need to love that person with all of your heart - mutual respect and a mutual desire to feel connected via pleasure is enough for a more than magical experience. Human connection is important for us to live balanced lives; we feed off of each other. Not just in a sexual manner but in general. So when we are experiencing some of these lower vibrational emotions, the connection and input of another, is exactly what our being needs to be able to shift from the current paradigm that’s holding us in an emotional headlock. Their intentions just need to be pure.
It's like when you're feeling shitty and you don't want to see anyone, but your friend pops in to show some love. Although you may initially be hesitant to have the encounter, once they're there, your energies entangle and align; your whole mood lifts. & Thats without having body parts consuming each other...
There's a reason why he/she feels like the perfect fit.
Why the pussy tightens and pulls him in. Why your breath aligns and the vibrations of the moans make you weak. Why you melt into each other and become one for a while. Why life can be created in a swift, sexy moment.
Sex is fucking magic.
I hope you learnt something today.
Speak soon, Lovers
SIS xxx
Click on images for the source. Pic of me is by @ninety.ii