SEX WITH THE EX

Hello my dirty little darlings, oh how I’ve missed writing you some sauce… Your girls been busy, busy drowning in my ex's juices if I’m being completely transparent. 

I WOULD NEVER GET BACK WITH AN EX 

Oh dear Shannon, how you have changed. How did we end up here…again? Are we enjoying it? Is this it now? So many questions that I will endeavour to answer in the following lines of filth because what’s life without a lil naughtiness? 

Boring, that’s what it is. 

Over a month ago I found myself in the same space as one of my ex boyfriends. An ex from almost a decade ago. It was no shock he was there, it was to be expected. Our friendship groups overlap so we’ve seen each other every so often over the years. If you know me, you’ll know that I’m friendly with most of my exes. Not in a: ‘let’s text and meet on a regular basis’, but more of a, ‘if I’m going to see you out in person I will always say hello and have a quick chat’, kind of way. I thought this day would be like any other, a quick hello and a catch up. 

But your girl was bludclart wrong. 

I was tired after a long drive back from up North so I wasn’t my usual chirpy self. I was quiet and in my observation zone when my bestie and the ex start bantering with each other. I giggle as my bestie draws him out on some shit. He responds by drawing me out for laughing and assuming I was thinking some bull shit that I was definitely thinking. A little later on he makes a remark that I cannot for the life of me remember, however, I do recall replying in a flirtatious manner, ‘if I remember rightly you can be gentle when you want to be’. *insert insatiably sexy eye contact here. 

And that my friends, is how you open the gate of chaos. 

The sexual chemistry has always been wild with us both. To the point where I know if I spend too much time around him as a single woman, I will voluntarily choke on his willy. & what a divine willy it is. I literally have to draw a border in my head that is impenetrable, because one moment of intense eye contact is enough to make my pussy puuurrrr. I was feeling loose, the borders were in fact, penetrable. This man is naturally very attentive, he enjoys giving and we’re both similar in that way. I’m not just talking sexually, he’s a giver in general. I didn’t want for nothing the rest of the day. Drinks, food, attention and most importantly of all, BELLY LAUGHS. Fuck, I forgot how good it was to have my walls down, allowing myself to receive and just relax around a man. 

You. You’re coming home with me!

We made our way from one pub to another and whilst I was enjoying my people’s, I realised that all I wanted to do was get this man in a private setting. Not even on a sex ting, I just wanted to be drowning in his essence, I missed him. That’s the funny thing about exes, we tend to remember the bad things more, because it helps us move on. I was staring into his earthy eyes and couldn’t remember why I left 9 years ago. We leave the gang momentarily to pop to the shop. Before making our way back into the pub, we’re teasing each other and getting a little vulnerable about what went wrong a decade ago. Although the conversation was somewhat difficult, it felt easy. That ease provided me with a compulsion to place my lips on his. I sway a few steps closer, stare into those eyes, grab his head and pull him close. Gently swirling my tongue in his mouth and sucking on his bottom lip. I can feel myself getting excited. 

I was cautious but curious.

This doesn’t have to be anything serious, I said to myself. Let me just enjoy my evening with this man that once meant a lot to me. He drives me home and I obviously invite him inside. As we lay on my bed catching up on the time we missed, I can’t help but get flashbacks of some of the sexy times we had together… in this exact room. Like when I first sucked his dick with my curtains wide open, broad daylight, ready for the world to see. I live in a bungalow and my bedroom window is right next to my front door for your reference 👀. I’ve been horny with anticipation for the last few hours now, and whilst my years celibacy is firm in my mind and only a month from completion, my body can’t help but react to the conversations we’re having. The growth he appears to have embodied is making me fucking wet. 

Do I have the willpower to not let him inside me?

We spoke about everything from our past, to our traumas and our successes. The level of intimacy coming from those conversations was something I had been craving more than I realised. Feeling how open he was about himself and how curious he was to learn more about me, provided a space where I felt I could fully inhale and release some tension that had been sitting idle for a while. It was inevitable that some form of play would take place but I didn't anticipate this. Sex with an ex can go one of two ways...

I haven’t cummed like that in YEARS. 

The next few hours were all about ME. The patience, the attention to detail, the enjoyment in his eyes as he’s slowly finger fucking me. The veins and muscles in his forearm rippling as he slowly pushes his middle and forefinger deeper inside me. Watching my juices flow with every insertion, biting his lip as my puddle begins to pool. The eye contact as my hips grind on his fingers; hungrily demanding more. With the waves of pleasure consuming me he looks up, and as we catch each other's eyes, a smile jerks on both of our faces, no words are needed; I see you. As my bed begins to rattle with the motion of my body, I climax for the first time that night. 

Was he always this good?

This man is greedy, just how I like it. He doesn’t stop there, the excess juice flowing out of me just fuels his deeper desire to serve. He calls me a goddess as he admires how pretty this pussy is, just before he takes his big mouth and slurps up my cum. He teasingly pulls back and begins to sensually kiss my thighs and groin which are super sensitive after my orgasm. All I'm thinking is, I need his fat cock inside of me right fucking neow! But then I'm also thinking, damn I don't want to completely fuck up this celibacy. I tell him my thoughts and he replies saying he is conscious he doesn't want me to fuck it up too... yeah right, buddy. His seductive eyes stay locked onto mine as he continues to lower his head and devour my pussy. His head game was one of the main things I remembered from before and it's only got better.

He's a fucking animal.

The pace started slow and sensual, building up the tension once more. The motions of his tongue started off gentle and coordinated, not missing a millimetre of skin. Progressing into aggressive and chaotic sucking of my clit, motor-boating my pussy until my screams and cries echoed through the walls of my home. I try to pull away but simultaneously I can't get enough. My hips are gyrating into his mouth, my hands firmly pushing the back of his head, if my pussy could open up and swallow him whole, it would.

I cum, again. & Again.

With drunken tiredness and multiple orgasms consumed, we finally fall asleep. I won't lie to you, I woke up not knowing how to feel. It was this weird sensation of closeness mixed with some anxious attachment and over thinking. We get up and take my dogs for a walk, can't deny some fresh air especially when I'm feeling slightly hungover. As we begin to head back to mine, I can't help but get this overbearing feeling of sadness, I don't want to leave him. But I don't want to form an attachment that's just about sex, soo? He asks if I want to go for breakfast and believe me I do. I refuse, give him a kiss and say goodbye.

Next, I head to the besties to catch her up on the Shannonigans.

Whilst I glowingly delve into the delicious details with my girl, I realise I'm in my feels and need to chill the fuck out. I also realise I do not have this mans number. Why the fuck didn't I ask him for it? I try to partake in the conversation at hand but all I can think about is getting his number. 30 seconds later, it's secured. I have not paragraphed anyone like this in a very long time, I'm talking years, not months. He holds my attention with ease. He intuitively knows what I want and I rarely have to ask for something he's not already thought about.

Recipe for a wet fanny if you ask me.

Luckily for the ex, I had absolutely no hot water in my house for the next week. Guess who used that as an excuse to slide to this man's place every day? MEEEEE. I mean, I didn't let him penetrate me that first night at mine, so I know I can hold it together, right? WRONG. All those yummy qualities translated to the bedroom. Watching him watch himself fuck me, is genuinely one of my favourite pass times. I remembered it was 9 years ago too. I can't explain to you the feeling I get when his face screws up, looking at my pussy like he fucking hates her whilst he's simultaneously telling me how much he loves her. Observing his hips thrust at naughty angles, feeling his balls slap against my pussy. Admiring his thickness as he slides in and out of me; he makes me fucking melt.

I broke 11 months celibacy for this ex.

And it was worth every fucking moment. Life is strange, it works in wondrous ways and whilst I didn't complete my full 12 months, I did receive something that I was hoping to get. A chance at building something deep and intimate with someone who truly sees me. Did I imagine that coming in the shape of my ex? No, but it feels right. Things feel different this time and I'm enjoying putting the things I've learnt over the last few years to practice. Can’t let a dude lead if you’re not willing to relinquish control and thats something that I have struggled with in the past. I'm trusting his decision making and he be making the right ones.

Plus, it's the best sex I’ve had in years.

Best company I’ve had in years too. I've done more with this man in the few months we’ve seen each other than we did throughout our entire relationship last time around; he's putting the other ex's to shame. All the things I’ve asked the Universe to provide me in a man, he is delivering. I’m not in my head about him, I’m not moving weird or obsessed (just the healthy amount), and I’m genuinely excited to see where this goes. It's early doors but I'm lapping it all up and staying present. Just because I'm locked off now, doesn't mean you won't be reading anymore naughty stories... let's just say me and the ex are adventurous 😈

Until next time, Lovers

SIS xox